The book of no : 250 ways to say it-- and mean it-- and stop people-pleasing forever

"This book will free you. It is one of the most liberating, empowering, and practical topics I've seen . . . and Susan Newman does a masterful job bringing it home." —Joseph Grenny, New York Times bestselling coauthor of Crucial Confrontations "The skill of saying 'no' is essential for a life of freedom and dignity. Dr. Newman's book, through a series of carefully analyzed examples, teaches that skill." — Herbert Fensterheim, Ph.D., coauthor of Don't Say Yes When You Want to Say No Overscheduled? Overworked? Overburdened? Get the "No-How" you need to take back your life Refusing someone is rarely easy and is often downright uncomfortable. But constantly giving in creates anxiety, anger, added stress, regret, and feelings of powerlessness. Bestselling author Dr. Susan Newman helps you break your debilitating "yes" habit with her simple techniques, scenarios, and insights. Tackling family, friends, coworkers, and even pushy salespeople, The Book of No helps you Recognize when someone is manipulating you into saying "yes" Avoid being socially overcommitted, and put an end to feelings of resentment, anger, and guilt Get more enjoyment out of the time you make for friends and family Establish boundaries and be more focused and effective at work Susan Newman, Ph.D., a social psychologist, is the author of thirteen relationship and parenting books, including Parenting an Only Child , Little Things Long Remembered , and Nobody's Baby Now . Visit Dr. Newman's website at www.thebookofno.com. Publishers Weekly Do you feel guilty when your child demands that you launder his soccer uniform immediately? Does an out-of-town friend suddenly want you to clear your calendar for an unexpected visit? In this handy manual, social psychologist Newman (Parenting an Only Child) writes with humor but a no-nonsense tone, offering 250 short, dramatic scenes that demonstrate workable techniques for helping you just say no. Newman contends that for many people, saying yes to whatever is asked of them is an unhealthy pattern driven by a need for approval, love or admiration, rather than a desire to help. To those who make a habit of accommodating others against their better judgment, the author suggests making a weekly list of yeses, noting if your time is well managed, learning to prioritize and set limits and giving up the need to be in control. Newman outlines familiar examples of demands made by friends, family and co-workers, and even forceful strangers such as telemarketers (just refuse and hang up). Although Newman doesn't write specifically for women, most of her illustrations present wives, mothers and workers as typical of today's overwhelmed yes women. Agent, Carol Mann. (Jan.) Copyright 2005 Reed Business Information. A leading psychologist teaches you how to wield the power of "no" and banish the disease to please forever.The Book of No teaches you how to say "no" to just about anybody--and everybody--friends, family, bosses, and co-workers--without starting your guiltmeter running. Insights and tips help you understand why you have trouble saying "no" and move beyond what ranges from mildly annoying to a crippling inability. It inoculates you against the "Yes"-disease and offers the courage to refuse and the knowledge and know-how to remain steadfast in that decision in the face of another person's power, influence, bullying, or disappointment--whether real or perceived. "Refusing someone is rarely easy and is often downright uncomfortable. But constantly giving in creates anxiety, anger, added stress, regret, and feelings of powerlessness. Bestselling author Dr. Susan Newman helps you break your debilitating "yes" habit with her simple techniques, scenarios, and insights."--Back cover Teaches readers how to say "no" to just about anybody - and everybody - friends, family, bosses, and co-workers - without starting the guiltmeter running. This book provides insights and tips help you understand why you have trouble saying "no" and move beyond what ranges from mildly annoying to a crippling inability. Contains some simple techniques and various scenarios to help develop the skill of saying "no" in order to avoid becoming stressed and overburdened with family, friends, and in the workplace