Something To Tell You: The Road Families Travel When A Child Is Gay (between Men--between Women) [download: Microsoft Reader]

Even now, at the end of the twentieth century, many still have difficulty standing up and saying, "I am the parent of a gay child." Something to Tell You recounts the stories of families whose lives have been touched by the discovery that a child is lesbian or gay -- how it affects and influences people's perceptions of their children and even changes the self-image of parents themselves.Focusing on fifty average families -- not people seen in clinics or therapy -- the authors found a consistent pattern of change: first negative, then positive. Sometimes the news led parents and siblings to form stronger bonds with the child, with each other, and with other relatives and friends. In many cases, their child's partner and partner's family grew to assume an important role in their own lives. In some cases, parents and siblings discovered new meaning in their lives through speaking out or joining PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) and becoming part of the struggle for lesbian and gay rights. The authors found that families committed to staying together are typically able to overcome the powerful obstacles imposed by society. Something to Tell You also shows the lasting and sometimes tragic consequences for families who falter in the process of integration. Unwilling to accept their child's sexuality, some parents sought to blame each other, and all too often their own relationships unraveled as a result. Others who failed to tell close friends sometimes lost those friends through keeping secrets. Parents who neglected to form bonds with their child's partner fostered climates of alienation that persisted for years.A richly diverse collection of family stories, Something to Tell You is a book that will help break down widespread prejudice and put an end to destructive cultural myths. It affirms families' highest aspirations toward active love for their gay children, showing the steps to take toward new levels of support, solidarity, and love. On The One Hand, The Book Is A Carefully Researched And Scholarly Work That Will Appeal To Researchers, Policymakers, Mental Health Professionals, And Service Providers. On The Other, It Is A Highly Readable, Enjoyable, And Informative Work For Families Of Gay Sons Or Lesbian Daughters. Foreword / The Rev. Paul Beeman, Pflag President -- Introduction: When Your Child Says, I Have Something To Tell You -- The Heterosexual Family Myth: How It Can Be Harmful -- What Affects A Family's Resilience? -- When A Family Loses Its Way: Disintegration -- Somewhere In The Middle: Ambivalence -- The Family Renewed: Integration -- You Have Something To Hear: New Cultural Ideals. Gilbert Herdt And Bruce Koff. Includes Bibliographical References And Index. Als een of meer van de kinderen homoseksueel, lesbisch of biseksueel blijkt te zijn heeft dat effect op het hele gezin. Als resultaat kan een gezin desintegreren maar juist ook hechter worden. Dit boek is gebaseerd op vele interviews met ouders van een lgb-kind en probeert een hulp/baken te zijn voor families die geconfronteerd worden met een niet-heteroseksueel kind. Ook handig voor sociaal werkers, psychologen en andere hulpverleners om een indruk te krijgen wat er binnen een gezin aan dynamieken kunnen ontstaan na de coming-out van een van de kinderen An internationally known anthropologist and an eminent social worker/psychotherapist show how families can thrive and actually grow through the creation of more honest relationships when a son or daughter comes out.