Religious Trauma, Queer Identities : Mapping the Complexities of Being LGBTQA+ in Evangelical Churches

"Drawing on rich, in-depth interviews and a strong theorical foundation in sociology and psychology, Hollier explores the experiences of LGBTQA+ individuals in evangelical churches, both those who stay and those who leave. This is a book of social and cultural significance, telling a story that the wider community needs to hear." Andrew Singleton, Professor of Sociology and Social Research in the School of Humanities and Social Sciences , Deakin University, Australia The power of this work comes from its deep engagement with the lived experiences of individuals who must navigate the structures and practices of institutions which tell them that two elements integral to their identity are incompatible. In providing these stories through a clear academic methodology the work provides empirical evidence of harm, but also of the resilience and hope that emerges among those who experience it. Jen Smith-Merry, Professor of Health and Social Policy in the Sydney School of Health Sciences and Director of the Centre for Disability Research and Policy In a polarised milieu that too often posits queer and Christian as competing realms, this book explores the complexities of identity development, religious traumatisation, and the task of creating safe faith spaces in which LGBTQA+ people can find healing, particularly in the Evangelical context. First, Joel Hollier examines the historical path of Evangelicalism, providing context for the current terrain of the culture war we find ourselves in. He then parses out experiences of gender/sexuality and religious/spiritual identity development, grounding them in an evolving theoretical base. Finally, Hollier offers a rounded critique of Evangelical church structures and mechanisms of trauma that hinder the healing process, along with potential sources of healing. Central to this work are the voices of LGBTQA+ people whose stories weave together a deeper understanding of the harms the Church has perpetrated, and the path forward. Joel Hollier is a social worker and academic with a background in theology and pastoral ministry. He is the author of A Place at His Table: A Biblical Exploration of Faith, Sexuality, and the Kingdom of God (2019), and is currently based at the University of Sydney, Australia. Acknowledgements Contents About the Author Part I: Laying Foundations Chapter 1: The Stories That Shape Us Introduction Behind the Stories Defining Some Terms Where We Are Headed Notes Chapter 2: My Story Introduction The Early Years Celibacy Coming Out Again Reflexive Practice Note Chapter 3: The Lay of the Land Introduction Signs of Change A Growing Divide: Church and Society A Growing Divide: Church and Church The Rise and Fall of Ex-Gay Ministries The Rise of Literature Promoting the “Gay Celibate” Movement Divisions Emerging The Rise of Contextual Theologies, Giving Space for Queer Theology Intrapersonal Conflict: Queer Christians in Context Conclusion Notes Chapter 4: Introducing Our Guests Introduction Part II: Spiritual and Religious Identity Development Chapter 5: “At War with Myself” Understanding the Trauma of Identity Dissonance in Australian LGBTQA+ Christians Introduction Theories of Conflict At War with Myself: Hearing Stories of Dissonance “I Am Broken” “I Am Sinful” Alleviating Conflict Rejecting LGBTQA+ Identity Rejecting Religious Identity Compartmentalisation Identity Integration Theological Reconstruction Engaging in Community Finding Role Models Normalising Nonconforming Gender and Sexualities Conclusion Notes Chapter 6: Unravelling: The Inevitable Task of Faith Deconstruction Introduction Defining “Deconversion” and “Deconstruction” The Deconstruction Process Intellectual Doubt, Denial or Disagreement with Specific Beliefs Moral Criticism Emotional Suffering Disaffiliation from the [Religious] Community Loss of Specific Religious Experiences Conclusion Notes Chapter 7: “I Can’t Un-Meet Jesus” LGBTQA+ Faith Reconstruction Introduction Theologizing in a Queer Manner Taking God out of Boxes Approaching “Heresy” Separating Religion from Spirituality Conclusion Notes Part III: Gender and Sexual Identity Development Chapter 8: Hearing Voices in the Closet Introduction Hearing Hidden Voices Keeping the Door Closed: Understanding Why People Stay in the Closet What Is Done in Secret Mixed-Orientation Marriages Conclusion Notes Chapter 9: Coming Out and the Trauma of Exposure Introduction The Positive Experiences “This House Was Dedicated to the Lord”: Navigating Christian Families Navigating Christian Communities Conclusion Notes Chapter 10: Seeking Authenticity Introduction Truth Confidence in Both Identities Personal Growth Freedom from Opinion of Others Uninhibited Connection to Others Resilience Conclusion Notes Part IV: Emerging Narratives of Trauma for LGBTQA+ Individuals Chapter 11: Domains of Trauma Introduction Minority Stress Theory Microaggressions Structural Mechanisms of Trauma When Is Homophobia Homophobia? Mischaracterisations Viewed as a Threat Erasure Relational Distancing Further Traumatic Instances The 2017 Postal Survey Being Outed The Impact of Trauma on Spirituality Conclusion Notes Chapter 12: Church as a Place of Healing from Trauma Introduction Towards a Model of Trauma Recovery Theological Considerations Respect Information Connection Hope Conclusion Chapter 13: Understanding Power in the Trauma Narrative Introduction Understanding Clergy Power The Nexus of Knowledge and Power Wielding Structural Power Reinvesting Power Conclusion Notes Chapter 14: A Conclusion Introduction Contribution to Knowledge Implications For Therapists, Clinicians and Pastoral Workers For LGBTQA+ People of Faith Limitations and Future Lines of Enquiry Drawing to a Close Note Appendix: Methodological Considerations Qualitative Research The Role of the Researcher Sampling Inclusion Criteria Data Collection Procedures Data Analysis Memo Writing Ethics Data Storage Index