Real Help: An Honest Guide to Self-Improvement

Are you finally ready, like really seriously ready, for a change in your life? Are you at that point in your life where you truly feel like it's 'make or break, that if you don't make something happen, fast, you probably never will? Some people are beyond help, truly lazy and hopeless, but that's not you. You're a smart person. Deep down, you know, that if you could just get some momentum you'd be able to create the life you want. But things just haven't clicked yet. It annoys you so much because you can see the path to success right there in front of you, but you can't bring yourself to do it. You're ready for a change, seriously ready. Still, it's tough to get self-improvement to stick, isn't it? So you keep starting and stopping, reading book after book, watching video after video, all the while you're starting to lose hope that any of your efforts will pay off. So what does work? You need a true wake up call. You need a message that hits you right between the eyes and down to the depths of your soul. If you're the type of person who simply needs clarity, direction, and some accountability, and a little bit of "tough love" to push you forward, then this is the book for you. Real Help: An Honest Guide to Self-Improvement details a half-decade knowledge and wisdom from Ayodeji Awosika: a self-taught 3-time author, TEDx speaker, and top writer on Medium with over 50,000 followers who went from broke, depressed, addicted to drugs and alcohol, and working a dead-end job to helping millions of readers per year with wisdom and insights to change their life. In this book, you'll learn how to: • Identify the key sticking points and blind spots that keep you stuck in loops of procrastination (even if you feel like they're a mystery to you) • Stop being a 'self-help junkie' who never gets anything done and start executing your ideas • Achieve massive success with little to no risk (even if you don't have a ton of money or resources) • Develop the mental toughness you need to thrive in an unfair world Introduction What Is Success? What You Can Expect Self-Help vs. Real-Help Real-Help: The Path to Actual Improvement You Lie to Yourself All the Time You’re Deathly Afraid of Giving Yourself to the World You’re Letting Someone or Something Else Dictate the Rules of Your Life You Will Experience Trauma, Tragedy, Unfairness, and Failure You Can Ignore the Nature of the World, but It Will Bite You in the Ass The Truth. You CAN Handle the Truth PART 1 THE BRUTALLY HONEST TRUTH ABOUT SUCCESS Chapter 1: Why Society Doesn’t Want You To Succeed How We Organize Societies Employers Aren’t “Out To Get You.” They Just Need You To Be Compliant There Are No Easy Answers Your Friends and Family Kind of Suck (I’m Sorry) The Media Wants You To Be Depressed, Sad, and Angry (Because It Helps Them Make Money) Food and Drink Companies Want You To Be out of Shape, and Big Pharma Wants You To Be Sick Make No Mistake About It, You’re Fighting an Uphill Battle Chapter 2: Nobody Is Coming To Save You How To Thrive in an Imperfect and Chaotic World Decisions, Decisions, Decisions Resourcefulness > Resources The Land of Endless Opportunities Be Brutally Honest With Yourself “I Deserve [X]” “It’s Just Life, I Guess” “It’s Someone Else’s Fault” Choose Your Path Wisely Chapter 3: Faustian Bargains: How To Avoid Trading Your True Life Away for Even Worse Outcomes The Faustian Bargain The LinkedIn Trade The Time Trade Lies You’re Told To Steal Your Time The People Trade The Economics of Life Chapter 4: The Unfair Attitudes You Must Adopt to Be Successful 99% of What You Hear, See, and Experience Will Contradict the Way You Think You’ll Feel Lonely (But You Must Get Used to Being Alone) Nobody Believes in You “Success” Will Take Longer Than You Want The World Is Constantly Trying To Throw You Off Balance Chapter 5: The Meritocracy Myth: Why “Success” Is More Complicated Than You Think The Genius Monkey So Why the Hell Do We Read Self-Improvement Books? You Can Do Everything Right and Still Not Get the Outcomes You Want People Less Talented Than You Will Surpass You You’re Not a Genius (But You’re Not Stupid Either) How To Thrive in a Random World Stop Reading Books and Articles About Becoming a Billionaire Increase Your Odds Value Traits That Have Nothing To Do With Luck Chapter 6: How To Escape a Life of Monotony and Improve Your Life (Without Being Rich or Famous) How To Stretch Your Thinking and Become More Ambitious Stop Thinking Like a Poor Person Know How To Properly Aim Chapter 7: Mindset Inequality: The New Gap Between the Haves and Have Nots The Pointless Culture War The Movie Theater Called Life The Steelman Argument for Negativity and Pessimism How I (And a Small Handful of Others) View the World Extremely Low Barrier to Entry and Capital Requirements Alternative Sources of Education Vertical Technological Progress Endless Opportunity and Serendipity The Bottom Line for Both Camps PART 2 STRATEGY: HOW TO BUILD THE LIFE OF YOUR DREAMS Chapter 8: The Ultimate Guide To Discovering Your Natural Talents and Strengths The Pitfalls of Passion Tools To Help You Discover Your Strengths and Talents Strengths Finder 2.0 Strength 1 - Ideation Strength 2 - Strategic Strength 3 - Intellection Strength 4 - Input Strength 5 - Adaptability Myers-Briggs Type Index Big 5 Personality Test Listen To What the World Is Trying To Tell You Your Upbringing The “It’d Be Cool ...” Test Feedback: The Insights That “Hide in Plain Sight” How To Go From Potential to Kinetic The Bookstore Test Talk Isn’t Always Cheap Using the Strengths You’ve Already Developed Keys to Identifying Strengths in Past Work Use Your Strengths To Take Action Using Your Strengths To Find Better Employment Using Your Strengths To Start Your Own Venture Chapter 9: The Art of Hustling: How To “Eat What You Kill” Lies You’re Told About Entrepreneurship Entrepreneurship Is “Risky” You Need To Be a Genius To Start a Business Most Businesses Fail Learn To Become a Master of Leverage The Life-Changing Magic of Compounding Why the First Six Months of Your Hustle Matter Most One Billion X Better Fighting Through to the End How To Start a Successful Side Hustle and Make Your First $1,000/Month The Many Levels of Hustling Freelance Writing, Design, Coding, and Marketing E-Commerce Businesses Lifestyle Businesses Build Your Talent Stack Break the Monotony Chapter 10: How To Achieve Massive Success Without Taking Massive Risks Are You a Turkey? The Antifragile Lifestyle The New American Dream How To Live an Antifragile Life Go to Parties Hobbies With No Goal Read More The Equation That Almost Always Works in Your Favor Chapter 11: Play Games You Can Win A Simple Strategy for Success That ANYONE Can Follow The Circle of Competence The Myths of Success Smart People Avoid Fail Fast Hustle Pornography Work-Life Balance Jack of All Trades, Master of None Stay In Your Lane Chapter 12: The Self-Care Trap: How To Actually Care for Yourself on Your Journey to Improving The Happiness Dichotomy Problems Self-Care Can’t Solve The Root Causes That Make You Feel Bad in the First Place The Underlying Sense of “Not Being Good Enough” The “Outward Success” Problem The Societal Magic Trick The Money Incentive The Conditioning Incentive The Ego Incentive What You’d Do If You Really Cared for Yourself Self-Care Should Be a Reward Self-Care Cures the Diagnosis What This Means for You Chapter 13: Don’t Pour From an Empty Cup The Archetype of the Generous Scorekeeper The “I Gave Up My Dream for My Kids” Lie The Life-Changing Magic of Putting Yourself First The More You Have, the More You Can Give Be More “Selfish” Chapter 14: How To Properly Navigate the World on Your Journey to Self-Actualization The Nobody Phase Answer the Call The Many Challenges The Climax, Final Battle, and Return Home How To Deal With the Crabs in a Bucket Mentality Pretend You’re Like Everyone Else Stop Wanting People To Believe in Your Legitimacy PART 3 MOVING FORWARD: HOW TO BUILD YOUR LEGACY Chapter 15: How To Turn Your “Little Project” Into a Real Empire Make a Splash On to the Next One The Point of No Return The Advanced Phase: Time To Build Your Empire Chapter 16: The Sentence I Tell Myself Whenever I Struggle Pay Attention to Your Ghosts It’s OK To Be Down, Just Get Back Up Chapter 17: Stop Being a Self-Help Junkie (And Start Living Your Life) Bibliography