Mark Twain's Guide to Diet, Exercise, Beauty, Fashion, Investment, Romance, Health and Happiness: A Politically Incorrect Self-Help Book from America's Greatest Humorist

This collection of Mark Twain quotes presents the best of the curmudgeonly writer's thoughts on diet, exercise, medicine, smoking, drinking, romance, parenting, old age, fashion, finances, politics, and stress management. Curated by a well-known Twain expert and mining lesser-known texts, speeches, and notebooks, it's the perfect gift for anyone who's had enough of Gwyneth's self-righteous advice and the ramblings of the blogosphere. "Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any."from an April 15, 1882 speech "Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."from Pudd'nhead Wilson "The less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands."from "How I Edited an Agricultural Paper" Contents 6 Introduction: The Comfortable Road 8 Chapter One: Exercise 13 Chapter Two: Diet 21 Chapter Three: Sleep & Rest 35 Chapter Four: Smoking 45 Chapter Five: Drinking 51 Chapter Six: Curing a Cold 59 Chapter Seven: Stress Management 73 Chapter Eight: Anger Management 83 Chapter Nine: Maintaining a Positive Outlook 89 Chapter Ten:Beauty Tips 99 Chapter Eleven: Fashion 103 Chapter Twelve: Finance & Investment 113 Chapter Thirteen: Experience & Education 125 Chapter Fourteen: Political Philosophy 137 Chapter Fifteen: Religious Matters 153 Chapter Sixteen: Surviving Childhood 167 Chapter Seventeen: Romance & Marriage 177 Chapter Eighteen: Parenthood 183 Chapter Nineteen, Reaching Old Age, Finding Wisdom 189 Chapter Twenty: The End of the Road? 199 Acknowledgments 207 About the Author 209 Uploaded by [StormRG] 209 "A satirical self-help gift book showcasing Mark Twain's wittiest quotes about the life well lived"-- Provided by publisher