It's Not Always Depression : Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self

Fascinating patient stories and dynamic exercises help you connect to healing emotions, ease anxiety and depression, and discover your authentic self. Sara suffered a debilitating fear of asserting herself. Spencer experienced crippling social anxiety. Bonnie was shut down, disconnected from her feelings. These patients all came to psychotherapist Hilary Jacobs Hendel seeking treatment for depression, but in fact none of them were chemically depressed. Rather, Jacobs Hendel found that they’d all experienced traumas in their youth that caused them to put up emotional defenses that masqueraded as symptoms of depression. Jacobs Hendel led these patients and others toward lives newly capable of joy and fulfillment through an empathic and effective therapeutic approach that draws on the latest science about the healing power of our emotions. Whereas conventional therapy encourages patients to talk through past events that may trigger anxiety and depression, accelerated experiential dynamic psychotherapy (AEDP), the method practiced by Jacobs Hendel and pioneered by Diana Fosha, PhD, teaches us to identify the defenses and inhibitory emotions (shame, guilt, and anxiety) that block core emotions (anger, sadness, fear, disgust, joy, excitement, and sexual excitement). Fully experiencing core emotions allows us to enter an openhearted state where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, and clear. In It’s Not Always Depression, Jacobs Hendel shares a unique and pragmatic tool called the Change Triangle—a guide to carry you from a place of disconnection back to your true self. In these pages, she teaches lay readers and helping professionals alike • why all emotions—even the most painful—have value. • how to identify emotions and the defenses we put up against them. • how to get to the root of anxiety—the most common mental illness of our time. • how to have compassion for the child you were and the adult you are. Jacobs Hendel provides navigational tools, body and thought exercises, candid personal anecdotes, and profound insights gleaned from her patients’ remarkable breakthroughs. She shows us how to work the Change Triangle in our everyday lives and chart a deeply personal, powerful, and hopeful course to psychological well-being and emotional engagement. The Change Triangle Is A Map. It's A Guide To Carry You From A Place Of Disconnection Back To Your True Self. It's A Step-by-step Process For Feeling Better. When You Work The Change Triangle, You Are Using A Tool That Is At The Center Of Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (aedp), An Emerging Therapeutic Method That Teaches Patients To Identify The Defenses And Inhibitory Emotions (shame, Disgust, Anxiety) That Prevent Them From Being In Touch With Their Core Emotions (joy, Anger, Sadness, Fear, And Excitement) That Lead Us To An Openhearted State Of The Authentic Self: It's Where We Are Calm, Curious, Connected, Compassionate, Confident, Courageous, Clear. In This Book, Hendel Tells Stories Of Working The Change Triangle With Patients And Teaches Us How To Apply These Principles To Our Daily Lives-- 1: Getting To Know The Change Triangle. What This Book Will Do For You ; The Story Of Me ; The Change Triangle Basics ; How Comfortable Are You With Emotions? -- 2: Releasing Core Emotions. Fran's Panic, Anxiety, And Grief ; You Can Change At Any Age: Neuroscience And Neuroplasticity ; Experiment: Slowing Down -- 3: Identifying Trauma. Sara's Depression And Navigating Conflict ; We Are All A Little Traumatized: Small T And Big T Trauma ; We Are Wired For Connection: The Science Of Attachment ; Experiment: Giving Yourself Compassion ; Experiment: Self-parenting -- 4: Core Emotions. Bonnie's Rage ; Everything You Need To Know About Your Core Emotions ; Experiment: Noticing Internal Experiences ; Experiment: Finding Your Core Emotions -- 5: Inhibitory Emotions. Spencer's Social Anxiety ; Working With Anxiety, Shame, And Guilt ; Experiment: Calming Anxiety ; Experiment: Shaming Messages ; Experiment: The Shoulds You Encounter Daily ; Experiment: Guilty Feelings ; The Healing Emotions Of Joy, Gratitude, And Pride In The Self ; Experiment: Joy, Gratitude, And Pride In The Self -- 6: Defenses. Mario's Story: Moving Through Trauma To Peace ; Defenses ; Experiment: Noticing Your Defenses -- 7: The Openhearted State. Sara Redux: The Authentic Self And Openhearted State ; The Self, The Openhearted State, And The C's ; Experiment: Finding Your C's ; Experiment: Plotting Yourself On The Change Triangle ; Experiment: Working The Change Triangle. Hilary Jacobs Hendel, Lcsw ; Foreword By Diana Fosha, Phd. Includes Bibliographical References. Part 1: Getting to Know the Change Triangle What This Book Will Do for You The Story of Me The Change Triangle Basics How Comfortable Are You with Emotions? Part 2: Releasing Core Emotions Fran’s Panic, Anxiety, and Grief You Can Change at Any Age: Neuroscience and Neuroplasticity Experiment: Slowing Down Part 3: Identifying Trauma Sara’s Depression and Navigating Conflict We Are All a Little Traumatized: Small t and Big T Trauma We Are Wired for Connection: The Science of Attachment Experiment: Giving Yourself Compassion Experiment: Self-Parenting Part 4: Core Emotions Bonnie’s Rage Everything You Need to Know About Your Core Emotions Experiment: Noticing Internal Experiences Experiment: Finding Your Core Emotions Part 5: Inhibitory Emotions Spencer’s Social Anxiety Working with Anxiety, Shame, and Guilt Experiment: Calming Anxiety Experiment: Shaming Messages Experiment: The Shoulds You Encounter Daily Experiment: Guilty Feelings The Healing Emotions of Joy, Gratitude, and Pride in the Self Experiment: Joy, Gratitude, and Pride in the Self Part 6: Defenses Mario’s Story: Moving Through Trauma to Peace Defenses Experiment: Noticing Your Defenses Part 7: The Openhearted State Sara Redux: The Authentic Self and Openhearted State The Self, the Openhearted State, and the C’s Experiment: Finding Your C’s Experiment: Plotting Yourself on the Change Triangle Experiment: Working the Change Triangle Final Words Dedication Acknowledgments Resources Appendix A Appendix B Bibliography Notes About the Author "The Change Triangle is a map. It's a guide to carry you from a place of disconnection back to your true self. It's a step-by-step process for feeling better. When you work the Change Triangle, you are using a tool that is at the center of Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP), an emerging therapeutic method that teaches patients to identify the defenses and inhibitory emotions (shame, disgust, anxiety) that prevent them from being in touch with their core emotions (joy, anger, sadness, fear, and excitement) that lead us to an openhearted state of the authentic self: it's where we are calm, curious, connected, compassionate, confident, courageous, clear. In this book, Jacobs Hendel tells stories of working the Change Triangle with patients and teaches us how to apply these principles to our daily lives"-- Provided by publisher