It's none of my business what you think of me! : if you want to change your life-- change the way you are looking at it

Life is a series of contracts the ego makes with itself; reality is the shadow these contracts put upon our souls. Just as a businessman makes a contract with other businessmen, so too does your ego make contracts. These contracts begin when you are a child, and you unknowingly enter into them with your parents, friends, teachers, employers, and the mass media. These contracts will make you poor, sad, and unhealthy if they are kept. Our ego tells us how much time and effort to spend in getting others to approve of us. Everyone goes through a domestication period-a time where others tell us what we should eat, act like, want, and not want. This domestication period ends when we decide that it has ended. INTRODUCTION: What Grandmother Said 10 My Grandmother's secret Recipe of Life: 16-36-66 Principle 11 PART 1: Age 16 13 CHAPTER ONE: Ego and the Contracts It Makes with Itself 15 Domestication 16 The Baseball Mitt 17 The Power of Words 17 Nancy 18 A Positive Example 18 The Cult of Domestication 18 Limiting Yourself 19 Labels 20 CHAPTER TWO: Domestication, a Closer Look 22 Don't Waste Your Energy 23 Know Who You Are 23 The Environment of Domestication 24 Self-Judgment 24 The Contracts You Make 24 CHAPTER THREE: The Two Doors: Fear Versus Love 27 Fear, the Frantic Voice 28 Love, the Quiet Voice 28 CHAPTER FOUR: Sin 31 A New Definition of Sin 32 An Improved Definition of Sin 32 Sins We Commit 33 CHAPTER FIVE: Perception 36 Act from a State of Presence 37 Do Not Take It Personally 38 Your Perception about Yourself 38 Your Perceptions Are Not Your Own 39 Changing Perceptions: Lose the Critical Spirit 39 CHAPTER SIX: Giving It Your All 42 Why Give 100 Percent When 70 Percent Will Do? 43 Do Not Be a Clock-Watcher 44 Marriage 44 Contrast 45 PART 2: Age 36 48 CHAPTER SEVEN: Choosing a Career 50 Did You Choose Your Career or Did Your Career Choose You? 51 Scripts You Are Fed 51 Taking Control 51 A Personal Story 52 Career Choices to Make if You Are a Teen or Young Adult 52 How to Find Your Archetype 53 Career Choices to Make if You Are a Parent of a Teen 53 CHAPTER EIGHT: Lifestyle by Design 56 How Do You Approach Life Situations? 57 Do You Choose Life or Does Life Choose You? 57 Would You Give a Four-Year-old a $100 Bill? 57 Is Choosing Against All odds Madness? 58 You Are Enough 59 CHAPTER NINE: The Power of Words 61 Becoming Gossip-Resistant 62 Intentional Spell-Casting 63 Gossip by the Group 63 Your Internal Axiom 63 CHAPTER TEN: It Is Never about You, It Is Always about Them 66 Subjective Reality 67 Guilt 68 CHAPTER ELEVEN: Presumptions of the EGo 70 We Believe What We Presume 71 Do not Assume 71 Justifying the Ego 72 Negotiating a Relationship 72 CHAPTER TWELVE: Marriage and Responsibilities 75 Practical Love 76 Problem Patterns in a Marriage 76 It Is OK to Love Yourself First 77 A Word about Sex 77 Responsibilities and Children 77 PART 3: Age 66 79 CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Grandmother's Advice on Living an Optimal Life 81 The six Golden Saviors 83 Optimism 83 Unlearning Optimism 84 Purpose 84 Goals 85 Action 85 Courage 85 Humility and Graciousness 86 Ways to Practice Humility and Graciousness 87 CHAPTER FOURTEEN: Final Thoughts and Conclusions 89 The Pain Body 90 Find Your True Consciousness 91 Your Call-to-Action: 92 The Answer to the Question 92 ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Peter Baksa on Giving Back 94 NOTES 98