In the company of women : indirect aggression among women : why we hurt each other and how to stop

Two leading experts on gender issues in the workplace describe how indirect aggression among women undermines their professional and personal success, and explain how to change conflict into cooperation. Following the success of Queen Bees and Wannabes and Odd Girl Out, about aggression in girls, In the Company of Women explains how indirect, or "relational," aggression can hurt women and hinder them from achieving success and harmony in their adult lives. Gender studies have shown that when a goal is in sight, men generally use direct action to attain it. Women, on the other hand, have been socialized to express aggressive actions through indirect means-using behavior such as shunning, stigmatizing, and gossiping to emotionally cripple those standing in the way of the achievement they seek. With startling insights into the meaning of our everyday behavior, this book offers straightforward techniques to change conflict among women into cooperation by resolving discords peaceably, building relationships, and making the most of women's unique leadership and communication skills. Table of Contents Praise Title Page Copyright Page Dedication Acknowledgements Introduction CONFLICT - Why Women Behave the Way They Do ONE - THE GOLDEN TRIANGLE: RELATIONSHIPS, POWER, AND SELF-ESTEEM TWO - THE POWER DEAD-EVEN RULE THREE - FROM THE XX FILES: THE ORIGINS OF WOMAN-TO-WOMAN CONFLICT FOUR - LESSONS FROM CHILDHOOD FIVE - THE BITCH FACTOR: INDIRECT AGGRESSION COLLEAGUES - Finding Powerful Allies and Friends Among Women in the Workplace SIX - THE GOAL IS THE RELATIONSHIP SEVEN - LOOSENING POWER DEAD-EVEN DOUBLE BINDS EIGHT - HOW TO HAVE HEALTHY CONFLICT WITH ANOTHER WOMAN NINE - HANDLING CONFLICT WITH STYLE TEN - HOW TO BE AN EFFECTIVE FEMALE LEADER ELEVEN - BUILDING A DREAM TEAM A FINAL WORD APPENDIX A - BOOKS ON SELF-ESTEEM APPENDIX B - CONFLICT STYLES QUESTIONNAIRE ANSWER KEY NOTES REFERENCES INDEX ABOUT THE AUTHORS Heim and Murphy draw from the latest research on brain structure, evolution, and socialization to explain why women's workplace relationships are unique. They describe what makes catfights happen-and how to avoid them. With startling insights into the meaning of everyday behavior, they offer straightforward techniques to change female conflict into female alliances by resolving discord peaceably, making the most of women's unique leadership skills, and building relationships with female superiors, colleagues, and employees. WHEN WE ASK MEN who their best friend is, most will identify their wives.