Book club kit. What happened to you? : conversations on trauma, resilience, and healing

Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain development and trauma expert, Dr. Bruce Perry, discuss the impact of trauma and adverse experiences and how healing must begin with a shift to asking, “what happened to you?” rather than “what’s wrong with you?” Through wide-ranging, and often deeply personal conversation, Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Perry explore how what happens to us in early childhood – both good and bad - influences the people we become. They challenge us to shift from focusing on, “What’s wrong with you?” or “Why are you behaving that way?,” to asking, “What happened to you?” This simple change in perspective can open up a new and hopeful understanding for millions about why we do the things we do, why we are the way we are, providing a road map for repairing relationships, overcoming what seems insurmountable, and ultimately living better and more fulfilling lives. Many of us experience adversity and trauma during childhood that has lasting impact on our physical and emotional health. And as we’re beginning to understand, we are more sensitive to developmental trauma as children than we are as adults. ‘What happened to us’ in childhood is a powerful predictor of our risk for physical and mental health problems down the road, and offers scientific insights in to the patterns of behaviors so many struggle to understand. A survivor of multiple childhood challenges herself, Oprah Winfrey shares portions of her own harrowing experiences because she understands the vulnerability that comes from facing trauma at a young age. Throughout her career, Oprah has teamed up with Dr. Bruce Perry, one of the world’s leading experts on childhood trauma. He has treated thousands of children, youth, and adults and has been called on for decades to support individuals and communities following high-profile traumatic events. Now, Oprah joins forces with Dr. Perry to marry the power of storytelling with the science and clinical experience to better understand and overcome the effects of trauma. In conversation throughout the book, the two focus on understanding people, behavior, and ourselves in the context of personal experiences. They remove blame and self-shaming, and open up a space for healing and understanding. It’s a subtle but profound shift in our approach to trauma, and it’s one that allows us to understand our pasts in order to clear a path to our future - opening the door to resilience and healing in a proven, powerful way. Grounded in the latest brain science and brought to life through compelling narratives, this book shines a light on a much-needed path to recovery – showing us our incredible capacity to transform after adversity. "Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain development and trauma expert Dr. Bruce Perry discuss the impact of trauma and adversity and how healing must begin with a shift to asking "What happened to you?" rather than "What's wrong with you?". Through deeply personal conversations, Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry explore how what happens to us in early childhood influences the people we become. They challenge us to shift from focusing on "What's wrong with you?" or "Why are you behaving that way?" to asking "What happened to you?". Many of us experience adversity that has a lasting impact on our physical and emotional health. What happens to us in childhood is a powerful predictor of our risk for health problems down the road and offers scientific insights into the patterns of behaviors so many struggle to understand. Here, Winfrey shares stories from her own harrowing past and her understanding of the vulnerability that comes from facing trauma at a young age. Joining forces with Dr. Perry, one of the world's leading experts on childhood trauma, Winfrey marries the power of storytelling with science and clinical experience to better understand and overcome the effects of trauma. The two focus not only a new understanding of people's behavior but also on trauma's effects on our own lives. It's a subtle but profound shift in our approach to trauma that allows each of us to understand our past so that we may clear a path to our future - opening the door to resilience and healing in a proven, powerful way." -- From dust jacket. Our earliest experiences shape our lives far down the road, and What Happened to You? provides powerful scientific and emotional insights into the behavioral patterns so many of us struggle to understand. Through this lens we can build a renewed sense of personal self-worth and ultimately recalibrate our responses to circumstances, situations, and relationships. It is, in other words, the key to reshaping our very lives. Oprah Winfrey This book is going to change the way you see your life. Have you ever wondered "Why did I do that?" or "Why can't I just control my behavior?" Others may judge our reactions and think, "What's wrong with that person?" When questioning our emotions, it's easy to place the blame on ourselves; holding ourselves and those around us to an impossible standard. It's time we started asking a different question. Through deeply personal conversations, Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain and trauma expert Dr. Bruce Perry offer a groundbreaking and profound shift from asking Whats wrong with you? to What happened to you? Here, Winfrey shares stories from her own past, understanding through experience the vulnerability that comes from facing trauma and adversity at a young age. In conversation throughout the book, she and Dr. Perry focus on understanding people, behavior, and ourselves. Its a subtle but profound shift in our approach to trauma, and its one that allows us to understand our pasts in order to clear a path to our futureopening the door to resilience and healing in a proven, powerful way. TITLE PAGE COPYRIGHT NOTICE DEDICATION A NOTE FROM THE AUTHORS INTRODUCTION CHAPTER 1 MAKING SENSE OF THE WORLD CHAPTER 2 SEEKING BALANCE CHAPTER 3 HOW WE WERE LOVED CHAPTER 4 THE SPECTRUM OF TRAUMA CHAPTER 5 CONNECTING THE DOTS CHAPTER 6 FROM COPING TO HEALING CHAPTER 7 POST-TRAUMATIC WISDOM CHAPTER 8 OUR BRAINS, OUR BIASES, OUR SYSTEMS CHAPTER 9 RELATIONAL HUNGER IN THE MODERN WORLD CHAPTER 10 WHAT WE NEED NOW EPILOGUE RESOURCES CREDITS AND ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ALSO BY BRUCE D. PERRY AND OPRAH WINFREY ABOUT THE AUTHORS COPYRIGHT Copyright Title Page Dedication Contents Chapter 1: ‘I’m thinking’ – Oh, but are you? Chapter 2: Renegade perception Chapter 3: The Pushbacker sting Chapter 4: ‘Covid’: The calculated catastrophe Chapter 5: There is no ‘virus’ Chapter 6: Sequence of deceit Chapter 7: War on your mind Chapter 8: ‘Reframing’ insanity Chapter 9: We must have it? So what is it? Chapter 10: Human 2.0 Chapter 11: Who controls the Cult? Chapter 12: Escaping Wetiko Postscript Appendix: Cowan-Kaufman-Morell Statement on Virus Isolation Bibliography Index Oprah Winfrey, sharing stories from her own past, and a renowned brain development and trauma expert discuss the impact of trauma and adversity and how healing must begin with a shift to asking, "What happened to you?" rather than "What's wrong with you?"