Beanstalker and other hilarious scarytales [eBook - NC Kids Digital Library

Once upon a time, a girl skipped into the forest and became a zombie. Wait, no, that's not how this story is supposed to go. Let's try again. Once upon a time, a boy did a horrible job as a sheep-sitter and burned his tongue on stolen pie. No, children in these stories are always good and virtuous. From the top. Once upon a time, a king and queen tried to find a princess for their son to marry, and he wound up fleeing from a group of very hairy vampires. Hmmm... What about, once upon a time, a bunch of fairy tales got twisted around to be completely hilarious, a tiny bit icky, and delightfully spooky scarytales... in other words, exactly what fairy tales were meant to be. Grab some flaming torches, maybe don't accept that bowl of pease porridge, and get ready for a wickedly fun ride with acclaimed author Kiersten White and fairy tales like you've never heard them before. Kiersten White, the author of the NYT bestselling Paranormalcy trilogy, is ready to make her middle grade debut! Once upon a time, a girl skipped into the forest and became a zombie.Wait, no, that's not how this story is supposed to go. Let's try again.Once upon a time, a boy did a horrible job as a sheep-sitter and burned his tongue on stolen pie.No, children in these stories are always good and virtuous. From the top.Once upon a time, a king and queen tried to find a princess for their son to marry, and he wound up fleeing from a group of very hairy vampires.Hmmm...What about, once upon a time, a bunch of fairy tales got twisted around to be completely hilarious, a tiny bit icky, and delightfully spooky scarytales... in other words, exactly what fairy tales were meant to be. Grab some flaming torches, maybe don't accept that bowl of pease porridge, and get ready for a wickedly fun ride with acclaimed author Kiersten White and fairy tales like you've never heard them before. Unfair hair Snow White, Blood Red The Princess and the ...pea? Little Dead Riding Hood Cinders and ashes Goldilocks and the three sisters Jack the Beanstalker Bad apple The boy who cried zombies Vampires and Zombies and stepmothers, oh my!. Snow White is a vampire, Little Red Riding Hood is a zombie, and Cinderella is an arsonist--and that is only some of the mayhem the reader will find in this collection of fractured fairy tales.