After the Affair : Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful

For the 70 percent of couples who have been affected by extramarital affairs, this is the only book to offer proven strategies for surviving the crisis and rebuilding the relationship –– written by a nationally known therapist considered an expert on infidelity. When I was 15, I was raped. That was nothing compared to your affair. The rapist was a stranger; you, I thought, were my best friend. There is nothing quite like the pain and shock caused when a partner has been unfaithful. The hurt partner often experiences a profound loss of self–respect and falls into a depression that can last for years. For the relationship, infidelity is often a death blow. After the Affair is the first book to help readers survive this crisis. Written by a clinical psychologist who has been treating distressed couples for 22 years, it guides both hurt and unfaithful partners through the three stages of healing: Normalizing feelings, deciding whether to recommit and revitalizing the relationship. It provides proven, practical advice to help the couple change their behavior toward each other, cultivate trust and forgiveness and build a healthier, more conscious intimate partnership. Infidelity is often the deathblow to a relationship. But it can also be a wake-up call, challenging couples to confront the issues that led to the affair and build a healthier, more intimate relationship than before. As a clinical psychologist who has been treating distressed couples for twenty-one years, Dr. Janis Abrahms Spring has found that couples can survive infidelity, provided that both partners are willing to look honestly at themselves and at each other and acquire the skills they need to help themselves through such a shattering crisis. After the Affair is the first book that explains exactly how to do this, offering a series of original and proven strategies that enable both partners to heal from infidelity without viewing each other simply as victims or victimizers. For those who are going through the pain, confusion, and anger of an infidelity, After the Affair can help you cope with the raging emotions, make a thoughtful decision about your future, and, if you choose to recommit, reclaim a life together.

A leading therapist and expert on infidelity offers emotional support and proven strategies to help couples overcome one of the most devastating events in any committed relationship. After the Affair is the first book to help readers survive this crisis, and guides both the hurt and unfaithful partners through the stages of grief. 304 pp. 80,000 print.

Provides advice to married people on surviving an affair by changing behaviors and cultivating trust and forgiveness A guide for couples provides exercises to help readers overcome feelings of betrayal and recommit to marriage