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A "must-read" ( The Washington Post ) funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams. Have you ever looked around and wondered, "Why has everyone found love except me?" You're not the only one. Great relationships don't just appear in our lives—they're the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love. Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn't lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how. This "simple-to-use guide" (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone ) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories. You'll learn: -What's holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern) -What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn't) -How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you) -How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love) -How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews) -Why "the spark" is a myth (but you'll find love anyway) This "data-driven" ( Time ), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams. "Love, as the saying goes, make fools of us all. But behavioral scientist and dating coach Logan Ury wants to fix that. A lasting, loving relationship doesn't just happen. It's the result of a series of decisions: when to date, who to date, who to settle down with, if you should break up, and everything in between. Very often, we don't understand why we're making certain decisions, and that causes us to make mistakes. And our current dating environment-with its overwhelming amount of options and constant pressure to make the right choice-only makes those decisions harder. Logan studied psychology at Harvard and spent years researching relationships. Here, she explains expectations, emotions, and other invisible forces that drive our faulty decision-making. But awareness on its own doesn't lead to action. (Knowing you shouldn't date "bad boys" or "manic pixie dream girls" doesn't make them any less appealing.) You have to do something. And Logan shows you how. Each chapter focuses on a different decision, from the first date on, and includes big ideas from behavioral science, original research, hands-on exercises, and stories about people just like you, to help you find-and keep-love. You'll learn: -What's really holding you back in dating-it's not what you think (and how to overcome it) -How to meet people in real life (and how to not come off as creepy) -Why your current dating app filters won't find a great match (and how to fix them) -Why you should always go on a second date (unless you're getting serious serial killer vibes) -Why "The One" doesn't exist (but you'll find love anyway) ... and much more!"-- Provided by publisher Title Page Dedication Author’s Note Introduction Section 1: Getting Ready Chapter 1: Why Dating Is Harder Now Than Ever Before Chapter 2: The Three Dating Tendencies Chapter 3: Disney Lied to Us Chapter 4: Don’t Let Perfect Be the Enemy of Great Chapter 5: Don’t Wait, Date Chapter 6: Learn Your Attachment Style Chapter 7: Look for a Life Partner, Not a Prom Date Section 2: Getting Out There Chapter 8: You Think You Know What You Want, but You’re Wrong Chapter 9: Meet People IRL (In Real Life) Chapter 10: This Is a Date, Not a Job Interview Chapter 11: F**k the Spark Chapter 12: Go on the Second Date Section 3: Getting Serious Chapter 13: Decide, Don’t Slide Chapter 14: Stop Hitching and Stop Ditching Chapter 15: Make a Breakup Plan Chapter 16: Reframe Your Breakup as a Gain, Not a Loss Chapter 17: Before You Tie the Knot, Do This Chapter 18: Intentional Love Acknowledgments Appendix Critical Conversation Planning Doc Relationship Contract: Self-Reflection Worksheet Relationship Contract About the Author Notes Copyright